The pale light had barely managed to illuminate Sean’s room when he opened his 
eyes. He blinked until he was able to focus on the nearby clock and see that he
had woken about half an hour before the alarm was due to sound. It took him a 
few moments to adjust to the unfamiliar surroundings of his new bedroom, but 
then his thoughts instantly turned to the man in the other room. Sean felt a low
heat in his stomach at the thought of Viggo in his clothes, on his couch. He 
rubbed his hand over his eyes and let it rest there trying to banish the nagging
ache in his body, Oh don’t even go there Bean!

He ignored the fact that he was half hard, told himself it had nothing to do 
with Viggo and swung his legs over the side of the bed. “I’ll make him 
breakfast... then send him on his way.” Sean grumbled, pulled on his jeans from
the night before and made his way into the living room contemplating whether or
not to splurge on a big fry up breakfast and if the nearby market would have 
decent bacon. His thoughts stopped short when he approached the couch. The 
blankets were neatly folded next to the pillows, Viggo was gone. Sean didn’t 
even consider that he might just be in the bathroom because there was one of 
Viggo’s drawings sitting on the coffee table.

Sean hated to admit it, but he was disappointed that Viggo had left before he 
had a chance to talk to him … spend some time with him. He thought Viggo had 
started to trust him a little last night and suddenly this seemed very important
to Sean.

He picked up the drawing and sat on the couch. He looked at a near perfect 
rendering of himself and Orlando; they were both laughing. Sean let his 
fingertips lightly touch the broad smile on his portrait, careful not to smudge
the fine pencil work, and wondered if that was how he looked to Viggo. He 
slumped back and let himself sink into the soft cushions … what would it take to
see Viggo laugh like that? He let out a heavy breath and put the sketch back on
the table. 


~~*~~

Orlando entered the shop with a huge grin, sidled up to Sean and asked, “Well?”

Sean knew what he meant, but tried to ignore Orlando’s implications, “What?”

Orlando rolled his eyes at Sean, “Did Vig stay over? Where is he?” 

“Yes he stayed over and he left before I got up.” Sean replied abruptly not 
really wanting to discuss this. Orlando was tempted to make a comment about 
Sean’s rapid exit from his bedroom the night before last, but decided against 
it. Instead he simply asked, “Things go okay?”

“Things went fine Orlando … now can we get some work done?” Sean turned away to
reinforce the fact that the conversation was over.

Orlando looked at the back of Sean’s head and grinned with the knowledge that 
Viggo was definitely starting to get to Sean.

Sean spent the morning slightly on edge, his anxiety building with each person
that entered the shop who wasn’t Viggo. He knew the time Viggo usually wandered
in, but that didn’t stop him looking from the first customer of the morning. 

Finally Viggo pushed the door open. The change in his appearance still took 
Sean’s breath away. Viggo hesitated as he passed the counter; he wanted to thank
Sean … there was so much he wanted to say to Sean, but still couldn’t quite find
his voice. Viggo had to keep telling himself that Sean was just a kind man who 
took pity on him … that’s all it could be … nothing else.

Sean watched Viggo hesitate and wanted to say something, but he desperately 
wanted to hear Viggo so he just stood and waited with his fingers clenched 
around a now very crumpled invoice.

The moment was suddenly broken with a loud cry of, “Viggo!” and Orlando ran out
of the kitchen and threw his arms around him. “See, I told you you are 
beautiful,” Orlando whispered as he hugged Viggo tighter. Viggo attempted an 
indulgent smile and tentatively let one of his arms encircle Orlando’s shoulder. 

Sean chuckled at the pained expression on Viggo’s face, “Come on lad, give him 
some breathing space.”

Orlando loosened his grip, grinned at Sean and grabbed Viggo’s hand, “We just 
got a whole new bunch of second hand books, I pulled out a few I thought you 
might like … they are next to your chair … there is even a whole trilogy, 
usually we just get the third book in a series which is a real pisser, but we 
got em all this time …” Orlando proceeded to drag Viggo to his section of the 
shop where Sean could still hear him babbling happily about books with the 
occasional, “Man, you look good” thrown in.

When a new customer approached the desk Sean realised he was still looking 
toward the second hand book section with a broad grin on his face. He knew he 
felt better today than he had in a long time.

~~*~~

The day was a fairly busy one with visits from both the local book club and the
aged pensioners to contend with, but Sean was pleased with the distraction. It
meant that Orlando’s attention was elsewhere allowing both he and Viggo some 
much-needed peace and quiet. 

Sean stretched hearing his neck give that satisfying crack and looked at the 
clock, it was already 4pm, time for a break. He made three mugs of tea and 
carefully carried them out to the front counter where he managed to catch 
Orlando’s eye and nodded down to the steaming mug. He then picked up the other 
two and walked to the back of the shop.

Viggo was sitting in his usual position, legs curled under him. When Sean 
approached he sat up straighter and took the mug with a smiled, “thank you.” 

Sean sat in the seat beside him and sighed, “I don’t know what has got into 
Orlando today, but he is driving me mad.”

To Sean’s surprise Viggo actually gave a low chuckle and shrugged, “He is just
happy I guess.”

Sean shook his head and laughed. Neither spoke for a moment, but this time the
silence was not strained. Both men sat and sipped at the too hot tea comfortable
in each other’s company until Sean looked up and said, “Thank you for the 
picture, it is really beautiful.”

Viggo gave a slight smile and replied very quietly, “You looked good together.”

Sean frowned, it bothered him that Viggo thought he and Orlando were a couple, 
“We are not … um, together. It’s nothing like that.”

“I know Sean,” Viggo murmured looking at Sean to see if he should continue, “but
I could see last night that you were …” Viggo sighed not sure how to put into 
words what he saw in their friendship, “You cared about each other.” 

“Care about that brat?” Sean joked feeling very relieved, “Actually he doesn’t 
give you much option does he?”

Viggo smiled and shook his head. His expression became more serious and he 
looked down at the mug, “Thank you Sean, thank you for finding me last night and
letting me stay.”

Sean swallowed hard at the emotion that suddenly welled at this simple 
statement. He wanted to touch Viggo, let him know it was okay. It seemed so easy
for Orlando, but Sean held back. “Anytime Viggo, I meant that,” Sean said 
quietly, but then felt the need to lighten the mood, “although you did miss out
on the perfectly good breakfast I had planned to make.”

“You were good to me and I didn’t want you to feel uncomfortable with me still
there this morning.” 

Sean was about to lie that he hadn’t felt awkward about Viggo’s presence in his
new home when he heard a female voice calling from the front of the shop.

“Well Bean stop hiding in the back, I know you are there.”

It was obvious that Sean recognised the voice. He looked at Viggo unsure of what
to say so he simply excused himself and made his way to the counter.

“So this is what you have come down to!” Marian laughed when she saw Sean 
approaching. She was of medium height and slight build with short wavy hair that
was almost strawberry blonde, but not quite. She could have been pretty, but 
instead looked ‘efficient’.

Sean gave her a hug and laughed, “Bloody Hell, you don’t see me a couple of 
months and the first thing you do is give me a hard time.”

“I’m sure I can make up for it tonight after dinner.” 

“You haven’t changed Marian, still making assumptions that you will always get
what you want.”

“I do always get what I want and tonight that’s you! Come on Bean, get your
assistant to lock up, we have a lot of catching up to do!”

Sean cringed at the term ‘assistant’, but still called over to Orlando, who was
watching them from the kitchen, “Can you lock up for me Orlando? Thanks.” He 
left without waiting for a reply.

Viggo sat in the chair listening to the exchange. He heard how easily they
flirted with each other before they left together … and he knew he had been 
kidding himself again, letting himself … 

Viggo put his mug on the floor next to where Sean had left his. He closed his 
eyes and rubbed a hand wearily over them reminding himself of what a fucking 
fool he was.

After Sean left the shop with Marian Viggo heard Orlando sit in the chair beside
him … he didn’t open his eyes when Orlando asked him if he was okay and flinched
away from Orlando’s hand on his hair.

~~*~~

Dinner was an easy mix of catching up on old friends and bitching about work 
colleagues. Marian filled Sean in on the progress, or lack of progress, in his 
division and who was doing whom on staff. They talked about her recent trip to 
London and her plans to stay in town for the next few months, however, for some
reason Sean was reluctant to discuss ‘Margins’. Marian acknowledged Sean’s 
reasons for ‘opting out’ for a year, but seemed totally unwilling to understand
that the little shop could actually be anything other than a minor distraction.

It was late by the time they drained their last cup of coffee and Sean wrapped 
his arm protectively around Marian as they walked back to the car through the 
park. He was relieved that dinner had gone well and they had quickly fallen into
their old routine of arguing over whose apartment they would end up in. Sean 
knew it was a power play between them, but enjoyed the familiarity of it.

He had just managed to sway her into ‘slumming it’ at his place when Sean 
noticed her looking towards the nearby public toilet block.

“That is disgusting!” She hissed.

Sean followed her eyes and saw a man in a cheap suit obviously paying for a 
quick fuck or blowjob. He curled his lip slightly at the scene and was about to
echo Marian’s sentiments when his gaze rested on the sleeve of the man taking 
the money. Just below the frayed jacket cuff he could make out green flannel … 
it was his shirt. Sean stopped mid stride and watched horrified as a man pushed
money into Viggo’s hand. As his fingers closed around the note Viggo glanced 
over and saw Sean. 

Viggo’s eyes widened and he suddenly felt like all the air had been squeezed out
of his lungs. Sean could read the shame and despair on Viggo’s face, but all he
felt was anger. He clenched his teeth and glared. 

Viggo’s stomach cramped as he felt Sean’s disgust roll over him, he wanted to 
throw the money back at the man and go to Sean, but that wasn’t real … it didn’t
happen that way. He was paralysed, pinned by Sean’s eyes, but the man grew 
impatient and gave Viggo a brutal shove towards the toilet block.

Marian looked curiously at Sean and asked, “Do you know him?”

Sean looked away from the scene and spat out, “Why the fuck would I know someone
like that!” He grabbed her by the arm and stormed to the park exit.

~~*~~

Orlando figured out pretty quickly that things did not go as planned on Sean’s 
date, although he knew better than to ask what was wrong … Sean was in a filthy
mood. Instead, to avoid Sean’s wrath, he sequestered himself away in the 
backroom where he could unpack and check the latest shipment from Penguin.

Viggo hovered around the front of the shop trying to find the courage to open 
the door. He had almost decided not to go in, but knew his regular routine was 
the only thing that kept him on track, kept him together … he knew he needed to
spend the day in his chair in the little shop. Viggo closed his eyes briefly, 
pushed the door open and hoped that Orlando would be at the counter. The 
doorbell was too loud today and set his nerves jangling … his breathing 
quickened as he looked at the counter and saw Sean.

Sean looked up at the same moment. Viggo desperately wanted to turn around and 
leave or put his head down and make it past the counter, but he knew he had 
filled his sketchbook … he had to have a new one before he could settle in his 
chair.

Sean watched as Viggo walked slowly towards the counter. Viggo slipped his hand
into his jacket pocket and then put a crumpled twenty-dollar note on the 
counter. The hesitant request for a new sketchbook was barely audible.

Sean pulled one of the water-damaged pads from under the counter and slammed it
down hard in front of Viggo. He was almost trembling he was so angry. Viggo 
cautiously picked up the book and pushed the money towards Sean. 

Sean looked down at the money and his gut twist into a painful knot. Suddenly 
all he wanted to do was wrap his fingers around Viggo’s collar and shake him … 
but instead he picked up the money, crushed it in his fist and threw it back at
Viggo hitting him on the chest.

“I don’t want this fucking money,” Sean hissed at him, “I saw how you earned 
it!” Viggo felt as if he had been physically punched and stumbled back from the
counter. 

Orlando heard the shouting and ran out of the backroom to see what was going on.
He looked from Sean to Viggo to try and figure out what had happened between 
them, but neither returned his look. He took a few steps towards Viggo and asked
quietly, “What’s wrong?” Viggo didn’t react to Orlando’s question and continued
to look at Sean. Orlando gently placed his hand on Viggo’s arm and asked again,
“Vig, please tell me, what’s wrong … what’s happened?”

This time Viggo turned and looked at Orlando, the pain in his eyes was evident.
When Orlando saw this he tightened his grip on Viggo’s arm, “Please Vig…”

Viggo shook his head so slightly that Orlando wasn’t sure it happened before he
wrenched his arm free and fled out the door.

Sean was standing looking at both the sketchbook and crumpled ball of money 
laying on the counter when Orlando rounded on him, “What happened Sean? What did
you say to him?”

Sean’s grip on his emotions was so tight that his voice came out surprisingly 
calm and slow, “I told him I didn’t want his money.”

Orlando eyed him warily, something was really wrong here, “Why not Sean?”

“I saw him Orlando, whoring himself out in a fucking public toilet.” Sean’s 
control slipped as he managed to get the words out.

Orlando looked at Sean, allowing the words to sink in. He could feel his own 
anger taking hold, “Fucking upmarket morals! Bloody Hell Sean, Viggo doesn’t
have a healthy bank account to dip into when he needs something … or even a 
fucking welfare cheque to cash. I can’t believe you did that to him … do you 
think he wants to sell himself?”

Orlando could feel tears of frustration and anger building behind his eyes, “Can
you even imagine what that must do to him every time he has to let someone … “ 
Orlando clenched and unclenched his hands as he fought to control himself, “I 
can’t believe you did that.”

Orlando turned away from Sean and walked out of the shop to look for Viggo.

*****